Happy path
The ideal scenario that never happens in real life, but we'll plan for it anyway.
Corporate buzzwords beginning with H
Decode business jargon with satirical definitions and related terms. Browse 79 entries.
Hard copy
A physical paper version of a document.
Hard pivot
To completely change direction, which is great until you realize you're just going in circles.
Hard stop
A firm end time due to another commitment, which is corporate speak for 'I have somewhere more important to be' or 'I've reached my limit of pretending to care.'
Hard stop
A firm deadline that will be extended three times before anyone actually meets it.
Hardcore
Corporate slang for 'intense' or 'serious,' often used by middle-aged executives trying to sound cool and edgy.
Headless commerce
An e-commerce architecture that separates the frontend presentation from the backend commerce functionality.
Headwinds
Factors that slow progress.
Heavy lift
A difficult task, which is usually difficult because no one planned it properly.
Herd immunity
When enough people believe in a bad idea that it becomes impossible to question it.
Herding cats
Trying to manage a difficult, uncontrollable group.
Herding cats
A corporate euphemism for "trying to manage people who don't want to be managed" that makes organizational dysfunction sound like a cute metaphor, usually used by managers who can't actually lead.
Hero culture
A toxic workplace dynamic where employees are expected to work excessive hours and sacrifice personal time to 'save the day' for the company.
HiPPO
Highest Paid Person's Opinion.
Hit the ground running
To start working immediately and effectively, which is great until you realize you don't know where you're running to or why.
Hit the ground running
To start working immediately, which usually means you'll hit the ground and then figure out how to run.
Hitting singles and doubles
Making small, consistent progress, which is great until you realize you need a home run.
Holistic
A word used to make basic, common-sense approaches sound sophisticated and comprehensive, usually when you can't think of anything more specific to say.
Holistic Architecture
More of a mantra than a method, Holistic Architecture thrives in quarterly reports and keynote speeches.
Holistic Ecosystem
Executives use Holistic Ecosystem to inspire confidence, while the rest of the team quietly Googles it.
Holistic Enablement
When someone says Holistic Enablement, it’s often code for ‘we don’t really know what this means, but it sounds innovative.’
Holistic Engagement
A paradigmatic abstraction that encapsulates the ineffable essence of nullity, engendering an overabundance of interpretations whilst paradoxically lacking any tangible merit, reminiscent of trophies awarded for participation in mundane …
Holistic Experience
Holistic Experience is a shiny phrase that tends to generate more steering committees than real outcomes.
Holistic Framework
Despite its futuristic vibe, Holistic Framework often results in the same status quo under a trendier label.
Holistic Initiative
Despite its futuristic vibe, Holistic Initiative often results in the same status quo under a trendier label.
Holistic Journey
Holistic Journey promises sweeping change, though in practice it’s usually just a rebrand of existing processes.
Holistic Mindset
Holistic Mindset promises sweeping change, though in practice it’s usually just a rebrand of existing processes.
Holistic Optimization
No meeting is complete until someone suggests Holistic Optimization as the next big move.
Holistic Pipeline
A paradigm of stakeholder facilitation that diligently orchestrates the holistic existential experience of all involved entities, whilst conveniently excluding the very users who will ultimately interface with the operational architecture.
Holistic Playbook
Teams invoke Holistic Playbook to suggest momentum, even when standing still.
Holistic Roadmap
When someone says Holistic Roadmap, it’s often code for ‘we don’t really know what this means, but it sounds innovative.’
Holistic Strategy
A paradigmatically nebulous signifier that quintessentially embodies the quintessence of shared worthlessness whilst feigning as a beacon of avant-garde dialogue.
Holistic Synergy
Despite its futuristic vibe, Holistic Synergy often results in the same status quo under a trendier label.
Holistic Transformation
Teams invoke Holistic Transformation to suggest momentum, even when standing still.
Holistic solutioning
Solving problems by creating bigger problems, but using fancy words to make it sound smart.
Hot desking
Shared desks available on a first-come, first-serve basis.
Human capital
A dehumanizing way to refer to employees that reduces people to economic assets, making it easier to treat them like commodities rather than human beings.
Hybrid Architecture
More of a mantra than a method, Hybrid Architecture thrives in quarterly reports and keynote speeches.
Hybrid Blueprint
Despite its futuristic vibe, Hybrid Blueprint often results in the same status quo under a trendier label.
Hybrid Enablement
Orchestrating the harmonious amalgamation of diverse procedural paradigms via the astute deployment of sticky substances, all while upholding the illusory veneer of effortless unity.